At Metropolitan Stadium, when the Twins were young, the hot-dog eaters knew: Nothing beat Peters!

Now & Then
Baseball Division (responsorial)

The REF in White Bear Lake: “The back of the 1961 Twins yearbook boasts an ad for Peters wieners — a precursor to the ‘Dome Dog.’

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“The bottom of the ad shows the FREE! Twins baseball cards that were included on every package of Peters wieners and porkettes. The reader is encouraged to collect all 26!

“If one had collected the set — and saved them — one would had a nice little nest egg. An eBay seller will part with the whole set for a mere $2,000!”

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And now LindaGrandmaSue of St. Cloud: “I had no idea that the Twins ball club started in 1961. My family moved to Minneapolis the summer of 1964, and I figured the team had been around forever. (Prior to 1961, they were the Washington Senators.)

“We attended a fair number of games. I remember sitting out in the left-field seats, soaking up the sun and getting terrible sunburns (because I don’t think we had sunscreen back in those olden days). [Bulletin Board says: In those days, you had Coppertone, Sea & Ski and other “suntan lotions” — all of them advertised to make you as brown as possible!] We brought our gloves with us in case that homer came towards us. I remember the announcer calling out the names Tony Oliva, Bob Allison, Harmon Killebrew, Earl Battey, Al Worthington. I remember the anticipation of the Seventh Inning Stretch. And the vendor shouting out ‘Get your ice-cold Frosty Malts,’ and my dad treating us to them. [Bulletin Board says: The Frosty Malt was unsurpassed, then or now.]

“I was able to attend several of the playoff and World Series games in 1987 and 1991. Again I hear the names: Danny Gladden, Kent Hrbek, Frankie ‘Sweet Music’ Viola, Kirby Puckett.

“Baseball is still my favorite — as are the Twins, win or lose.”

Life as we know it (responsorial)

Chopper of St. Paul: “D. Ziner [BB, 3/2/2017] has described perfectly the feeling I get when I go to Ireland.

“I step off the plane and suddenly feel as if I’m home. We don’t know what part of Ireland my relatives came from; nor were any of my living relatives first-generation immigrants. But it doesn’t matter — I belong there. Everyone looks familiar.

“I’ve often tried to explain it to others, that feeling of knowing a place that you’ve never been before, but I always come up short.

“Minnesota is where I live, but Ireland is my home.”

Gma Tom: “Wow! D. Ziner‘s story about our homing instincts really hit home (sorry) with me.

“Although I had never before considered the phenomenon, I realized at once that I, too, experience such pull. My father bought his own farm when I was 9 years old, and while I lived there myself for only nine years, and, due to poor health, my father lived there only 20 years, the place is still (and always will be) my dad’s farm.

“When Dad left the farm, my parents migrated back to the city, where he and Mom lived when first married and where their children were born.

“After my divorce, I, too, migrated back to the city of my birth. The home of one of the city’s founding fathers was for a time a ‘lying-in’ (or maternity) hospital. The home has since been restored to its former glory, and I have become friends with the current owners. I just can’t help telling people that I was born in my friend’s house; in return, he can’t help reminding people that it was a maternity home for just a short span of years — thus being able to pinpoint Gma Tom‘s age within a few years.

“And: Many years ago, prior to my first trip abroad, I wrote to the Buergermeister of the little village in Austria from which my grandfather immigrated as a child. While there were no relatives from my great-grandfather’s family still living in the village, I did find relatives on my great-grandmother’s side of the family and was fortunate enough to be able to visit with them.

“Yes, indeed, the ‘homing instinct’ does exist in the human species.”

Badvertising

Today’s nomination comes from badvertising connoisseur Jim Fitzsimons of St. Paul: “Subject: This bugs me…

“Hey.

“Have you seen the credit-card ad that touts its purchase protection against theft? If you have an item you bought with that card and it’s stolen, you can get it replaced at no cost to you. Seems pretty good, eh? I think so, but the ad makes me grind my teeth.

“The ad shows two women standing in a living room admiring the couch one of them had just purchased.

“‘Oh, this piece is so you!’ says the friend.

“I know — right? I saw it, and I was just, like, oh I had to have it!’ responds the proud owner of that new couch.

“Then the scene changes to the middle of the night. It’s the same room and couch, but this time there are two scruffy-looking men holding crowbars admiring the stylish piece of furniture.

“One says to the other: ‘This piece is so you!’

“The other replies: ‘I know — right? I saw it, and I was, like, have to have it!’

“However, these fellows aren’t buying the couch; they’re stealing it.

“See what the ad does there? Same dialogue, but very different meanings. So clever.

“Except home burglars aren’t going to be stealing couches in the middle of the night. Can you imagine them trying to lug out a couch without waking the homeowners? They’re not interested in furniture. Burglars are looking for wallets and purses filled with credit cards, checkbooks, and cash. They want jewelry, electronics, laptop computers, iPads, and cellphones — stuff that’s quick to grab and easy to sell or spend. They ain’t looking for furniture!

“And they certainly aren’t looking for items to improve the decor of where they live. They want money to, maybe, pay the rent, or to, most likely, buy drugs.

“My teeth get quite a grinding whenever that ads on. Actually, my teeth get quite a grinding from my watching most ads on TV. I should stop that.”

BULLETIN BOARD SAYS (AS GENTLY AS POSSIBLE): Well, no, we haven’t seen that one. But we’ve seen this one, for State Farm renters insurance (and the State Farm Rewards VISA credit card — which, as far as we can see, makes no promise to replace stolen merchandise.)

Maybe you should watch it again — eh, Jim? (LOL.)

Not exactly what she had in mind (self-responsorial)

John in Highland writes again: “BBers seemed to like the donkey-baseball story of Chico and Jerry, players in a New Jersey league. What was not mentioned was the trouble the burros could get into after being retired from baseball and ‘put out to pasture.’ They were not above stealing corn, tobacco and sweets.

“As the remaining posters from wife Margie’s story board demonstrate, you had to keep an eye on them.”

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Blinded by the lyrics

Fantomas reports: “Here’s the ‘Nancy’ comic strip for March 2, 2017, belatedly commemorating the passing of Mary Tyler Moore:

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“Like many other such tributes, this one incorporates misheard lyrics. As those of us who were not yet hearing-impaired when the show originally ran (or even when we watch reruns today!) can testify: It’s not ‘You can have a town,’ it’s ‘You can never tell.’

“I wish I’d kept track of how many tributes I’ve seen with the misheard version.”

A thought for today

Sally, the Cleaning Lady of Shoreview: “‘We have abundant reason to rejoice, that in this land the light of truth and reason has triumphed over the power of bigotry and superstition, and that every person may here worship God according to the dictates of his own heart. In this enlightened age and in this land of equal liberty, it is our boast, that a man’s religious tenets will not forfeit the protection of the laws, nor deprive him of the right of attaining and holding the highest offices that are known in the United States.’ — George Washington, 1st U.S. president, general (1732-1799)”

BULLETIN BOARD NOTES: Here’s the full letter containing that quotation:

From George Washington to the Members of the New Jerusalem Church of Baltimore, 27 January 1793

Fun facts to know and tell
Including: Everyone’s a (book [& TV]) critic!

Poet X of PDX: “Who knew David Duchovny was also an author? The author I was looking for at the library would have been immediately before Duchovny, but wasn’t there at all. Instead I checked out David Duchovny’s book ‘Holy Cow'(2015), a fun little piece of fiction narrated by Elsie, the cow. To say too much about the plot would ruin it. But I won’t hear the phrase ‘when pigs fly’ the same again.

“Speaking of Duchovny: I’d forgotten he appears in ‘Twin Peaks’ — in drag! This was a couple years before ‘The X Files.’ Showtime has now posted the entire series of ‘Twin Peaks’ in preparation for the new episodes, which will begin in May. The first season of ‘Twin Peaks'” was only eight episodes; the second and final season was much longer, 22 episodes (per IMDb). All together, it’s about 25 hours to review before May. I’ve seen the whole series at least twice, but it’s been over 20 years since I watched it, so I’m enjoying this refresher.

“Cherry pie?”

Muse, amuse
Or: Our times

The Doryman of Prescott, Wisconsin: “Subject: Picture this.

“The latest cartoon in my head: The drawing is of an accounting-firm hiring office, with the HR guy handing the job applicant a sheet of paper.

“The caption reads: ‘If you can explain my Xfinity invoice, the position is yours.'”

Band Name of the Day: Grinding Teeth

Website of the Day: Tim Torkildson’s Clown Alley

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