It happens every spring . . . though in the rarest autumn!
Where We Live Division
Lola: “With the major-league baseball season starting, here is a reminder of how much fun it was and how good it felt when our Minnesota Twins won the 1987 World Series.
Everyone’s a copy editor!
“Kenneth, What’s the Frequency?” Division
Gregory J. of Dayton’s Bluff: “This is the final week for KLBB-AM. [Bulletin Board says: Ain’t that a shame? There’s nothing else remotely like it, around here. We are streaming it even now — and mourning its demise already.]
“The radio station was sold and goes off the air at midnight on March 31. The Twin Cities will be losing one of its few remaining truly local stations.
“The St. Paul Pioneer Press had a very nice article about KLBB’s demise on Sunday. The main headline reads ‘A fading signal,’ followed by ‘KLBB-1120 will soon go off the air, likely ending Stan Turner’s popular radio show.’
“That should be KLBB-1220. KLBB transmits at 1220 kHz on the AM radio dial, as they used to say, not 1120 kHz.
“But to the paper’s credit, it was correct in the article and photo captions.”
Small enough for ya?
Or: What is right with people?
Friendly Bob of Fridley: “Subject: Life in a small town.
“You might be surprised by some of the goings-on in small-town Minnesota. Somehow I doubt you’d see stories like this in suburbia or in the big city.
“Suppose you are partially disabled and live in a small apartment with your cat. A housekeeper comes once a week to help with the household chores. You slip and fall getting out of the shower as the housekeeper arrives. Your cat freaks out and hides in the bedroom and will do nothing but hiss for either of you. So, who do you call? Why, the Chief of Police, of course! He responds in short order to calmly reassure the cat, and luckily you are not seriously injured.
“Now suppose you have broken a hip, and after hospitalization and some rehab at a nursing home, you are recuperating at home. Your adult daughter lives upstairs and helps out with things like driving. Other occupants include a few cats and a LARGE dog. Daughter is tied up in a larger town 15 miles away, and the dog really, REALLY has to go out to do its duty, but your mobility is too limited to take care of that chore. So, who do you call? Why, the Chief of Police, of course! He comes by and does what is necessary for Mr. Doggy, including a bit of a walk.
“These incidents happened to members of my family within the past few months. (I live over an hour away, so I could not go to the rescue.) This Police Chief is quite the guy, if you could not guess. On more than one occasion, he has been cited for his ‘above and beyond the call of duty’ actions. Lucky are those who live in his town.
Mounds View Swede: “Five Svenska Blommor.
“My first trip to Sweden was in 2007 and began on the island of Gotland, where I had a cousin I wanted to meet.
“We arrived there early evening and were pleased to find that the city of Visby had parks and flowers. I enjoy looking at them now while we are waiting for spring and flowers to show up here.
“We were especially intrigued by these tall blue flowers in fields and roadsides, along with the red poppies that seemed to be growing in many places.
“I had never seen poppies growing in the wild before, and they really caught my eye.
“There are more Svenska Blommor (Swedish blossoms) to come.”
Life as they know it
Cherie D of Shorewood: “Have you read any good quilts lately?
“The Bookies of Beacon Hill (Minnetonka) book club decided to create a quilt that illustrated their love of life, learning and reading. On the front of the quilt are squares where each member wrote a favorite quote. For the back of the quilt, club members were, amazingly, able to find fabric showing quotes from famous writers, books and from the Bible. The quilt itself was lovingly and painstakingly stitched by members of the book club. The photo shows the members proudly displaying their work of art.
“The Bookies of Beacon Hill book club was formed in October of 2009. The group reads a variety of genres, as well as doing comparative studies of authors (F. Scott Fitzgerald and Truman Capote, for example), writing haiku — and in May of this year, the members will each be discussing their own ‘diary entry’ a la ‘Through No Fault of My Own,’ by Coco Irvine, compiled by local writer Peg Meier. Ms. Meier, in fact, is one of several local writers who have attended a Bookies gathering to discuss their books.”
The workshop chronicles
Imperfections Division (cont.)
Kiddo: “I would like to add to the submissions of BBers who have shared what people say when something doesn’t turn out perfectly. My mom used to say: ‘A blind man riding by on horseback will never notice.’ I always felt it was quite whimsical.”
Kathy S. of St. Paul: “Subject: To Imperfect is Human.
“Imperfections in quilts, etc., have been mentioned recently. My understanding is that no quilt or piece of Japanese pottery is supposed to be perfect. The maker is expected to introduce a flaw in an item, if one doesn’t crop up all on its own, The theory I’ve heard is that only the Supreme Being is perfect.
“That’s their story, and they’re sticking to it.”
One Pebble of Maplewood: “Subject: Mistakes & Embellishments.
“In the early years of BBoard, I called in a couple of times but never had my bits published — and that was OK with me; I just enjoyed reading the stories of the contributors — Joybubbles, for example. I was sad when BBoard was no longer a daily treasure, but gladdened when I could get the email postings.
“I enjoyed IGHGrampa‘s octagon-box adventure and Stinky Bananalips‘ quilting embellishments solution. I belong to a Knitting & Crocheting group, and our solution to ‘errors’ and misadventures is to call them a ‘Susan Original’ or a ‘Mary Original.’ Please know that the names have been changed here to protect the directionally challenged.”
Gee, our old La Salle ran great?
Including: The Permanent Maternal Record
The Gram With a Thousand Rules: “For those people who yearn for the ‘Simple Lifestyle of the Olden Days,’ I urge you to look at the directions depicted on this advertising illustration. It was placed on the back of an ink blotter that I found in my Mom & Dad’s attic.
“This is exactly the way I remember the coal furnaces in our Minneapolis rental homes. That monster looked like a frightening, hungry mouth when my folks would open the door to shovel the coal inside.
“I have a vivid memory from one morning when I was 3. I woke up to the familiar sound of Mother stoking the furnace. When I went to find her, I noticed that our canary’s cage door was open, so I went down in the basement to tell her that the bird was out of its cage.
“On the bottom step, I caught the sight of Mother’s hefty underhanded pitch as she tossed that dead little bird into the fire. No, it didn’t traumatize me, but the horrified look on Mother’s face did when she realized that her little girl had witnessed the sacrifice of our sweet little canary to the fire.”
Fifteen nanoseconds of fame
Not-So-Great Comebacks Division
Al B of Hartland reports: “A few years ago, I spoke at an event that led me to be seated next to Edgar Mitchell, an astronaut who had walked on the moon. What do you say to a true moonwalker like that? There is great value in knowing when to say nothing, but I went with:” ‘I had a nice walk today.'”
BULLETIN BOARD SAYS: On second thought, the title of this item should be “Thirty nanoseconds of fame.”
After all, Edgar Mitchell got to sit next to Al B of Hartland!
Fifteen (more) nanoseconds of fame
On the heels of his recent post about a State Fair meet-up with Don Vogel, Tommy Mischke, and Chris Mars, here again is Jim Fitzsimons of St. Paul: “My wife was able to locate this photo from my early days. It was 1967, so I was 2 years old, going on 3 [Bulletin Board muses: That’s the usual progression!], when I met a man who meant an awful lot to Minnesota kids of the ’60s and ’70s. I really have only the vaguest recollections of meeting him, which is why I’m so glad to have the picture.
“It’s Casey Jones from the WTCN (former name of KARE 11) daily noontime kids show — ‘Lunch With Casey.’ The man was Roger Awsumb. He and Lynn Dwyer, as Roundhouse Rodney, put on a show for the kids of Minnesota every weekday. Filled with silliness, including lip-synching goofy songs, putting on skits (and skirts — there was a fair amount of drag on the show), and cartoons. I loved it.
“I thought I’d share the picture of that 2-year-old me with Casey.”
Department of Duh
Including: The Hat People
OTD from NSP: “I am in the market for a new dishwasher. The one I have is 18 years old, and the spokes on the racks are starting to break off and leave rust marks on the dishes.
“Called the appliance-repair company I use to see what they recommended. Looked up the two brands that were mentioned, to check features, price, etc.
“There was one one-star review for the model that is my first choice based on Internet search. The person gave a one-star review because they thought the control panel was complicated, and they had to use the manual to figure out how to set the dishwasher. I thought they might have done a typo or I was misreading the comment, so I checked the manual. The manual was step-by-step, illustrated, and was clear to me.
“I guess the person really thought the dishwasher rated one star because they needed to consult the manual. Scary, I hope they wear a hat when driving, to warn others.”
Another close encounter of the natural kind, documented by Jim Shumaker of New Richmond, Wisconsin: “Willow River otters enjoying some Sunnies on the ice, St. Croix County, Wisconsin.
“A beautiful animal!”
Please release me!
Leading to: The highfalutin pleasures
Charlotte of Inver Grove Heights: “On Sunday morning the 18th, when listening to Pastor Charles Stanley on TV, a song came to mind that I KNEW I had on a CD. It just wouldn’t let me go!
“I didn’t have time to research which CD it was until after dinner. I could hear it in my head, being sung by a certain ministry. I plugged what lyrics I could recall into a search engine, found the name of the song and the album it was on. Had an event to go to, so I couldn’t research it more until Monday. I did, however, find out that it WAS on one CD that I GAVE AWAY because I wasn’t too impressed by the rest of the CD!
“More research on Monday resulted in TRIUMPH! Not only did I find which CD the song was on, but I was able to BUY another CD they had also put the song on. I replaced that one and another that I still had on cassette tape! They should be delivered today from the gargantuan service that begins with A.”
Our pests, ourselves
Once in a Lifetime (Especially for the Mouse) Division
Deb Peterson of Eagan, Minnesota, reports: “I would place this in the ‘You can’t make it up’ category.
“While letting our dogs outside this morning, I discovered this little guy in the wall of our front entry!
“Alas, he did not survive, but he will be a delicious snack for one of our wild backyard critters.”
Could be verse!
Tim Torkildson writes: “From the New York Times: ‘American adults continue to put on the pounds. New data shows that nearly 40 percent of them were obese in 2015 and 2016, a sharp increase from a decade earlier, federal health officials reported Friday.’
“The woes of weight are heavy; there’s no doubt about that now.
“The experts say adults are eating too much processed chow.
“Food trucks and the drive-through make it easy to exceed
“The needs of mere nutrition as we impetuously feed.
“Heart attacks are gaining on us at an awful rate;
‘Diabetes fells us as we continue to tailgate.
“Our blood pressure is spiking at levels rarely seen
“Outside of octogenarians in Saint Augustine.
“Our children also suffer from a heedless appetite —
“Gorging on the candied Cap’n Crunch, both day and night.
“Sitting on their tuchases playing Final Fantasy,
“They’re plumping up like turkeys for November’s jubilee.
“But going on a diet of raw kale and herbal tea
“Is not the sort of lifestyle that appeals too much to me.
“Like Falstaff I will take my chances with debauchery,
“Enjoying ev’ry sweetmeat till they hang me from a tree!”
Our theater of seasons
Or: Here & There
Cheesehead By Proxy, “back in northern Minnesota”: “Up here in ‘da north,’ the changing season seems to be about two weeks later than in ‘The Cities,’ where I grew up. We still have quite a bit of snow in the woods, and this year I am finding myself to be impatient with the coming of spring after the long winter.
“Some years ago, a Bulletin Boarder wrote in with his or her description of spring divided into three parts or levels. There was low spring, middle spring and high spring, and for us this is low spring.
“I thought of that concept this morning and realized I have to appreciate these moments of low spring. The sun, when it’s out, has some warmth and a certain feeling to it. The birds are moving about. Gradually, there is some thawing going on.
“I heard a chickadee just now singing its spring song, which someone described as sounding like ‘Sweet-heart,’ because it’s a mating call. But the call seems to have three syllables, if you listen.
“So this morning I decided the chickadee was singing ‘Spring’s coming!’
“It won’t happen overnight or even in one nice day. Lessons in patience.”
BULLETIN BOARD SAYS: We don’t have time for patience! There’s golf to be played, and baseball to be watched. We’ve been yelling at the snow for weeks now: Melt, damn you!
Band Name of the Day: The Imperfects
Website of the Day, from Double Bogey Mike: The Bike-Share Oversupply in China: Huge Piles of Abandoned and Broken Bicycles