Or: The highfalutin amazements
The Gram With a Thousand Rules: “My oldest daughter, who lives in Australia, has been waiting a long time to become a grandmother, so when her daughter in Colorado gave her the long-awaited news, she knew she had to be there. She had already booked her trip to Colorado when her son informed her that his wife was also pregnant — due on the same day — in Australia. I’m told that after her first thrilled shout, as she digested the travel logistics involved, she uttered a few Grandpa Jake expletives and then muttered: ‘It will be OK. Babies never come on their due date, anyhow.’
Continue reading “When grandchildren are due on the same day, continents apart, what’s a Grandma-to-be to do?”
Here & There
Or: Life as we know it
Grandma Pat, “formerly of rural Roberts, Wisconsin”: “Over the years, I have learned of earthquakes in many parts of the world, and I have thought: ‘Oh, those poor people.’
“Now it is different. An Italian village where my family has roots has been destroyed. It has suffered three earthquakes. The third earthquake toppled the buildings that were already damaged and cracked by the two earlier quakes.
Continue reading “It takes a village to unraze a village. Pretare must rise again!”
Willard B. Shapira of Roseville writes: “I was working in the KSTP newsroom when, about 12:30 p.m., the teletype bells began ringing as I never had heard them ring before. A major story was breaking: JFK had been shot in Dallas and was being rushed to a hospital, where he subsequently died. Our news director, Harold ‘Bud’ Meier, now deceased, swung into action. He told me to grab a photographer and to shoot some footage of the gray, misty day along the Mississippi River, to use as a backdrop for the developing local aspects to the story.
Continue reading “Fifty-three years ago today: Where were you when JFK was murdered?”
Today’s nomination comes from longtime badvertising connoisseur Jim Fitzsimons of St. Paul: “Chevy has been running the same basic TV ad campaign for a few years now. The ads show a bearded fellow talking to ‘real people, not actors’ (as though actors aren’t real people, but I know what they mean) about how awesome Chevy cars and trucks are. They’re better built, they’re more reliable, they’ve won all the awards, and so on.
Continue reading “Black Friday Madness on the showroom floor — or: What brand of car are “real people, not actors” STILL clueless about?”
The Hot Stove League
Sleepless from St. Paul (in Minneapolis): “Being a ‘glass half full’ type of guy, my usual approach toward a bad Twins season is: ‘Well, things could be worse.’ But since this season was the worst, I needed a different approach. This might have been the Twins’ worst season, but it certainly was not the most heartbreaking. Honestly, we saw it coming back when baby bunnies were frolicking in springtime meadows.
Continue reading “What was the Twins’ most heartbreaking season? Plenty to choose from!”
The simple pleasures
Cruelly Aborted Division
Here’s Jim Fitzsimons of St. Paul (back in BB action, after a long and regrettable absence!): “With our long and glorious fall coming to an end and the first snowstorm of the season blowing in, I figured it would be prudent to make sure the snowblower is in working order.
Continue reading “Snow’s coming. Let’s check on the ol’ snowblower. How many pulls till it roars to life?”
You are what you eat (responsorial)
Friendly Bob of Fridley: “The submission from The Bitter and Disgruntled Guy from Andover about blood sausage [BB, 11/17/2016] reminded me of my first encounter with it.
Continue reading “Who stole the keeshka? How hungry would you have to be before you’d steal the keeshka?”