Want to enjoy your round of golf? Don’t worry about might show up on your scorecard!

Today’s helpful hint

Email from Donald: “Subject: The best advice I ever got.

“Rich worked for years in the pro shop at Tartan Park, but now he’s charming customers at Eagle Valley. I hadn’t seen him since he changed locations, but when my sons and I played there recently, he had his usual smiling face to accompany a warm greeting.

Continue reading “Want to enjoy your round of golf? Don’t worry about might show up on your scorecard!”

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Two rules of Clown Alley: (1) You don’t rat out another clown. (2) You don’t eat sardines — ever!

Clowning around

Tim Torkildson writes: “Subject: My First Can of Sardines.

“Long immured, as a child, by my mother’s staid Norwegian cookery, when I at last burst the shackles of home and joined up with the circus, I craved the finest and most exotic of cuisines. On a First of May’s salary, this was hard to conjure up; $90 a week, even back in 1971, did not allow me to order bowls brimming with vichyssoise or platters of filet mignon very often. Mostly I subsisted on a grilled cheese and bowl of tomato soup at Woolworth’s for 75 cents.

Continue reading “Two rules of Clown Alley: (1) You don’t rat out another clown. (2) You don’t eat sardines — ever!”

“From the minute we went through Dayton’s heavy revolving doors, I was in hog heaven.”

Now & Then

Little Sister writes: “Even though I haven’t darkened any doors of the Nicollet Mall in Minneapolis for years, I am sad to hear that Macy’s is considering closing the store. It’s another bittersweet reminder of a bygone era — not for Macy’s, but for what once was Dayton’s flagship store.

Continue reading ““From the minute we went through Dayton’s heavy revolving doors, I was in hog heaven.””

A funny thing happened on the way to the ballot box . . .

Dumb Customer Jokes
Polling Place Division — plus!

IGHGrampa: “Some things, you just should not joke about.

“I finished marking my ballot and took it over to the aide at the ballot box. ‘Just slide it right into the old paper shredder here?’ I quipped to him. His rather icy non-reaction let me know how my joke was received. Maybe he’s heard the joke before.161110bbcut-ivotedsticker

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What is a “weed”? What is “Batesian mimicry”? How many wings do bees have? (Answers below.)

Life as we know it
Including: Fun facts to know and tell

Al B of Hartland writes: “I walked about the yard, pulling plants that weren’t where they should be. A weed is any plant that is growing where it isn’t wanted. I yanked dandelions, both golden and globed, but I knew they’d be back.

Continue reading “What is a “weed”? What is “Batesian mimicry”? How many wings do bees have? (Answers below.)”

“I remember staring down at my submerged underwear and just feeling embarrassed by the whole idea…”

How far back?

D. Ziner writes: “One of my earliest memories was my baptism.

“I don’t recall going into our small upstairs bathroom, but I do remember sitting in the generously filled tub while many strange people filed in and towered above me. The men held their Bibles, and one read from his copy while the women held washcloths or hankies on top of their heads.

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‘If you can correctly pronounce my husband’s full name in three guesses, I might let you talk to him.’

Life in the Telemarketing Economy
Or: Boy, did they get the right wrong number!

Norton’s mom of Eau Claire, Wisconsin: “Norton’s dad and I have a landline telephone on which we have Caller ID.

“The other night, there was a call identified as coming from “unknown caller.’ We usually don’t answer anything from a number we don’t recognize, but when I saw that notation, I thought I remembered that one of our friends’/relatives’ calls came in with that description, so I answered it.

Continue reading “‘If you can correctly pronounce my husband’s full name in three guesses, I might let you talk to him.’”